Simply an impromptu post because I’ve had lots of thoughts on this topic lately. I felt compelled to share this with you today. Not sure where I’m going with it yet, I’m just writing and hoping to shine some light to as many mama’s feeling the same way.
Truth is yal, I don’t love being pregnant. I love the concept of pregnancy and the divine work my body is taking on during these nine months; however, I don’t enjoy being pregnant. Many of you may think I sound selfish or ungrateful, but honestly this is MY REALITY. I have struggled beyond measure with both of my pregnancies (not physically but emotionally and mentally). I recall with Kaden I was depressed and insecure my entire pregnancy, it took a huge toll on my wellbeing for 9 months. This time around I made sure to seek the guidance I needed to help me embrace this experience rather than dread it. As many of you have told me, I appear to radiate pregnancy in a positive way through my pictures & that’s because I refused to let anxiety/depression win this time. After the horrible first trimester experience, I knew something had to give. I was not going to be miserable again.
As the end of my pregnancy approaches, I think back on these past nine months and it’s been a roller coaster ride for sure. I have felt mixed emotions about having a new baby & that’s perfectly ok. I have questioned if I’m made or fit for this & that’s normal too. Society has a way of making you feel sh*tty if your pregnancy isn’t rainbows & butterflies, or if you don’t have the “glow” everyone talks about. I don’t know why women feel the need to portray such perfection on social media, but I’m here to tell you that you don’t have to love being pregnant. You’re going into the most beautiful & sacred role (motherhood), the process is truly a blessing, but no one should make you feel like you NEED to love everything pregnancy comes with.
For me, my pregnant days are over. I am planning on making this my last pregnancy because I know I wouldn’t be able to handle it all over again. To be real, having 2 boys is more than enough for me. NO I DONT WANT A GIRL. I am beyond fulfilled & thankful that I’ll have my boys to raise & help guide throughout life.
Mama’s & expectant mama’s: we all have different experiences, stop trying to compare one with another. The kind of pregnancy you have does not determine the kind of mom you’ll be. Instead of judging women that don’t love pregnancy, encourage & show them love a little more. You never really know what’s going on behind closed doors.
This is all, until next time. xx